We did n’t realize how much we ’d miss Warehouse 13 until it hail back . And then we remembered : the premature season terminate by hinting at some really dark stuff , leaving us expecting a time of year opener with some penetrative edge . Instead , we got a return to the show ’s common warm fuzzy tone . Which is what we should have expected all along .
Spoilers forward …
Last clock time Warehouse 13 ended on a crazy cliffhanger , it in reality did go somewhat dark — Artie turned malign and endeavor to poison the world , but we also got some fair brutal takedowns of the rest of the squad from Evil Artie , followed by a contrite Good Artie who just need to choke inside his own mind . But this sentence around , with the show only returning for a light time of year of six episodes , showrunner Jack Kenny clearly wanted to get back to sweetness and unhorse as promptly as potential .
And that ’s probably as it should be . In a TV landscape full of drear storytelling and bloody hands , Warehouse 13 is remarkably sugared and goofy . There are clever bits and aggressively observed fictional character moments here and there , but the overall step is by choice old - fashioned and even a bit downlike . That it knead is for the most part down to a really strong plaster bandage , with great chemistry , and writing that does n’t bow to give notice sentiment or cheap prettiness . It ’s not Game of Thrones , but it ’s not trying to be .
So if you expected Warehouse 13 to come after up on some of the darker togs from last season , then this episode signaled that you ’re look in the unseasonable place . On the other hand , the episode care to include an elongated Concentration refugee camp - inspired torment sequence without breaking the laughable tone , so there ’s that .
What actually happened
In the season opener , “ Endless Terror , ” we pick up where we left off , with Claudia face up the immortal Paracelsus and Myka getting surgical process for her ovarian cancer . Both things are wrapped up reasonably rapidly — Claudia gets enslave by Paracelsus and forced to try and drink down her friends , Myka ’s vesicle was benignant all along .
Then Paracelsus assembles a prison term car that allows physical ( rather than mental ) travel , with Claudia ’s unwilling help . He zooms back 500 days , to the day he was bronze originally , and kills the Regents , take absolute controller over Warehouse 9 . That means Warehouse 13 is straight off revamped into a high - tech futuristic version , chock full ‘ type O ’ dystopia , because Paracelsus has had 500 years to remake it in his own image .
So Pete and Myka leap back in time , dog Paracelsus , and have to halt him from killing the Regents and reclaiming Warehouse 9 . Meanwhile , Artie gets himself captured and nearly excruciate by his friend ( who do n’t love him because it ’s an alternate realness . ) Steve has to keep the time tunnel opened for Pete and Myka , while Claudia rescue Artie , sort of .
In the end , Paracelsus is roundly defeated , but Myka realizes that Pete helped Paracelsus because Pete thought Myka was dying of cancer and Paracelsus offered to help . And the evil Benedict Valda of Paracelsus ’ alternative universe of discourse finds a way to pull through in our world . Which means a few more episodes of malign Mark Sheppard , so that ’s a win .
The Alternate Warehouse
Warehouse 13 has usually carry off to encircle back to a few major themes during the course of its run : the abuse of power , the way in which object take on a meaning that outlive people , and what happens when the haywire masses have forbidden knowledge .
So the alternate Warehouse , in which Paracelsus check everything , is one of the complete explorations of these themes yet . Much like the installment wherea drug companionship nearly gets control over the Warehouse , this shows what happens when multitude use these brawny item for their own profit . Paracelsus has managed to twin some of the worst objects , turning people into his drones — Pete ’s jealousy that this Warehouse has the Borg is a standout funny moment — and he ’s been experimenting with combining artifact , using human subjects in a way that prompt Artie of the Holocaust .
What ’s novel , and somewhat riveting , about this version of the “ abuse of power ” idea is that Paracelsus is obsessed with skill as both a way and a goal — his slogans and his minion both spout a uncanny version of scientism in which science is a kind of god . And yet , he ’s mostly doing pseudoscience . There ’s no way to work up a real science around magical tablespoons and haunted antiques and affair . Paracelsus has somehow fool away himself into thinking that these objects are a valid field of scientific enquiry , and that he ’s bringing rationality to the previously superstitious Warehouse .
But even beyond the destructiveness of abuse these object , there ’s the fact that the rational response to them is to shrug and admit that they ’re bewildering and somewhat derisory . The way Artie more or less does .
Yes , this felt rushed
The downside to this episode was the agency it seemed to sweep things like Myka ’s cancer and Claudia ’s transformation into a new caretaker under the carpeting — those seemed to be major challenges at the end of last time of year , but they were put on cargo deck so we could defeat Paracelsus promptly .
Of course , both of these affair seem potential to return later in the time of year — Paracelsus truly seems to have believed that Myka was dying , and the fact that Pete snuff it to such lengths to save her is also a thing . And Claudia suppose something vague about how stuff is change , but she ca n’t say how yet . Presumably by the end of the season , we ’ll get more payoff on both of those lingering issue .
And then there ’s the “ Claudia ’s sister ” proceeds , which I ’d forgotten about during the long , long hiatus — and which this episode did n’t quite aid me remember . Claudia ’s sis was think to be dead , until Claudia got bronzed and Artie need some DNA to unbronze her before she disintegrated . So Artie used a blood sample distribution from Claudia ’s really - quite - alive sister , and all he would assure Claudia is that Claire is “ a grave cleaning lady . ”
So in this episode , Artie still wo n’t tell Claudia anything , but Claudia keeps insisting that she ’s older enough to make her own conclusion . Guessing that Claudia ’s sister and her fate as Warehouse keeper will dovetail somehow ? But time will tell , unless it gets warped again .
TelevisionWarehouse 13
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